Just Thought I'd Share With You All ...

Violet Hill - Coldplay has an alternative music video entitled - "Violet Hill ( Dancing Politicians)". It takes a stab at international politicians and features hilarious footage of George Bush dancing, while there is an audio overlay of a monkey talking. Top quality lip-syncing.

This is an officially licensed video from Parlophone(Coldplay's label).

It's been out for a while but I just watched it again and decided it was pretty coolio to share.

My Christmas Day ( The Delayed Photographic Event)

So as some of you may know, I spent my Christmas Day serving food to the less fortunate members of our community. This was not a problem for either me or my mother because my Uncle(who has no kids) works up in the mines and takes the Christmas shifts so that his co-workers with kids can go home. This results in everyone else in our family having to wait until the 29th/30th of December before we have Christmas lunch and so on.

That said, I still opened presents ... just at like 5 PM after we got home from the lunch serving and were organised.

I manned the potato station, where people would come up and I would place a potato onto their plate ... it was a gun job ... deal with it.

Some photographs from the event;




Me - Confused by the bread



Me - Now clearly not confused by the bread, and cutting it with my big muscular Christmas arms



I got so many phone number requests ...


Other highlights of the day included;

1 - The poor singing of the Asian choir

2 - The fat bogan couple, the woman looked like this -



3 - The hot chicks

4 - A small Irish boy asking me for a potato ... that was incredibly awesome!

UMKAY!

As we near the 100th post, let's take a look at the wonderful world of how awesome RW is?!

OK!
GO!

Firstly, let's take a look at the controversial music video for the song, "Rock DJ".

It features Mr.Williams dancing whilst girls on roller skates encircle him.
As he does so, he begins to slowly remove clothing, until he's reduced to this -



and eventually this -



Robbie then gets into trouble over the video, and millions of people are, "Offended". Video is now amongst the top-ten must-see videos of all time.




Here we see the album cover art from the album, "Escapology", featuring Robbie hanging upside down by a rope with a Mohawk.


Robbie then goes on to his live tour and produces a spectacular replica intro, arriving by helicopter before this -



In addition to being that awesome, he did it in front of in excess of 375'000 fans over three nights.

Quote of the day

There is nothing more joyous than watching a dog destroy a cardboard roll from wrapping paper.

Fact of the Week

Emin3m. (Yes that's a 3 instead of an E, but it's meant to look like the E is backwards so ... ).

In his song, "Hi, My Name Is", a fantastical phenomenon has been discovered.

The "Chorus" of the song consists of Eminem telling people his name is his alias, "Slim Shady".

It goes, "Hi, my name is, (What?), My name is, (Who?), [Scratches}, Slim Shady".

Now say the middle bit backwards, "My Name Is".

"Si emanym"
Or, "Is Eminem".



Brilliant.

List of Celebrities who have attacked paparazzi

Matthew must hate, despise, loathe and think despicable things of all of these people.

1 - Cameron Diaz
2 - Justin Timberlake
3 - Avril Lavinge
4 - Woody Harrleson
5 - Hugh Grant
6 - Britney Spears
7 - Kanye West
8 - Bjork
9 - Sean Penn
10 - Lily Allen
11 - Jude Law
12 - Pierce Brosnan
13 - Alec Baldwin
14 - Tommy Lee
15 - Vinnie Jones
16 - Hayden Panettiere
17 - Brad Garrett
18 - Danny Glover
19 - Steve Guttenburg
20 - Chris Martin

List of Musicians that have been arrested

Matthew must despise and think despicable things about them.

1 - Steve Earle
2 - Chuck Berry
3 - Sid Vicious
4 - Johnny Cash
5 - Slash
6 - Every member of Black Sabbath
7 - Every member of Guns 'n' Roses
8 - Chad Kroeger
9 - Amy Winehouse
10 - Kurt Cobain
11 - Every member of The Sex Pistols
12 - George Michael
13 - Robbie Williams
14 - Michael Jackson
15 - Paul Gray
16 - David Lee Roth
17 - Eminem
18 - Jay-Z
19 - Chris Brown
20 - Britney Spears

Shinoda Eyes Criminal Record

LINKIN PARK frontman MIKE SHINODA harbours a bizarre secret urge - to get arrested by police.
The musician and record producer insists there's no faster way to earn respect from pals than an encounter with cops.
He says, "I think it would be cool to get arrested to a certain degree... I feel like you get high fives from your buddies for getting arrested.
"If you had a sword fight with your buddy that would be so cool, it's a very tough, manly thing to do. And I'm obviously equating getting arrested with swordplay in my sick mind."


Boy what a great role model.

Source -
http://www.pr-inside.com/shinoda-eyes-criminal-record-r87237.htm

VIA; Mike Shinoda fan site - http://mikeksonline.blogspot.com

Epic FC vs Green and Mean

POTATO! ....

Thats the enthusiastic sound of James' suggested war-cry as we prepared to take on the Irish fuckers called Green and Mean.

The match began well, Epic F.C defending strongly with the new formation working wonders. The odd break was followed up every so often, until eventually James stepped up to smash his side 1 - 0 up.

So far so good, with the first 10 minutes of the match already gone, Epic F.C looked set to finish the half on top.

Unfortunately, this was not to be, with just 3 minutes left in the first half, a frustrated Potato man blasted away. Blaise, centrally standing tall, looked almost certain to block, as he had done many times beforehand. However, he missed his block, before the ball come rocketing towards Joe, who had a bout 0.6 seconds to react.

The goalkeeper did well to at least get a fingertip to the ball, but it wasn't enough to keep his side ahead, and the scores were tied a 1-1 at half time.


The second half began, with Green and Mean looking hungry to take the lead. A few shots were allowed on target, but Joe was equal to them all.

As Epic F.C began to push for another goal, they left their defensive duties behind, and almost got the goal, with a brilliant move that led to a powerful shot from Blaise Walker. However, his shot hit the post, and the chance was gone.

As the game began to become more desperate, another frustration shot was taken by a Potato man. In an almost mirror image of the first goal, Blaise moved to block, but the ball fizzed past him and left Joe with no chance to save.

At 2-1, Epic F.C new they had to go all out for the win. Pushing further forward allowed for more opportunities that were unable to become goals. Green and Mean broke on the counter attack several times, but Joe acted quickly to keep his side in the game, even saving a goal with his head.

Epic F.C looked to get an equaliser, but still no goal came. Instead, Green and Mean broke on another counter attack, and this time, Joe Blay couldn't save the goal.

At 3-1 Epic F.C looked for a way back into the match, but with just a minute remaining, Green and Mean defended in numbers and the game ended.

Final Score: 3-1
Goalscorer: James

Ninjariffic Blocks: Wong - 2, Blaise - 300'000'0000'23498
Ninjariffic Saves: Joe - 2

Is Music Professio Mihi Getting Lazy?

No 100 Interesting facts about LP ... still.
No Photo of the Weak for nearly 2 months.
I want more incriminating and sexualised photographs of our blonde haired associate.

HEY!

WHY ARE THERE NO MOORE RIVER PHOTOGRAPHS YET !
I KNOW YOU'VE ALL JUST ARRIVED HOME, BUT GET A MOVE ON MOFOS!

I WAS KIND ENOUGH TO SEND YOU PHOTOGRAPHS OF MYSELF WITH ALL THE BEAUTIFUL LAAAAADIES!

please
:)

Oh Wooooonnngyyyy

Mike Shinoda


Member of the Protestant Church ... one of the four major divisions of Christianity.

Mike Shinoda is a christian.

:)

Cue excuses?

Dawn of War - Metacritic Rating

Here are the Metacritic ratings for Dawn of War and each successive expansion;

Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - 86
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Winter Assault - 85
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Dark Crusade - 87
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Soulstorm - 73

Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War II - 85
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War II - Chaos Rising - (Yet to be released)

My Favourite is Dark Crusade, plus it's the one that you don't have to have to disc to play.
Soulstorm is really good, but it's lower rating is because the new races added are kinda boring.

I've never played Dawn of War II, but I've heard it's really good .. It's a weird modified RTS ... not really and RTS ... more like an RPG/RTS Hybrid.

Thee you go Wong.

Coldplay

Coldplay are holed up in a dilapidated north London church crafting a new album, report "The Sun" this morning. The band only finished their latest leg of their gruelling world tour in September but they are back at the coal face again.

And the fans who worshipped at the altar of last album, Viva La Vida, will be glad to hear super producer Brian Eno is back on board, masterminding a brave new direction for the group. Frontman Chris Martin is concerned the band are being seen as a huge stadium act and totally inaccessible for their loyal fans.

So he has devised a plan with rock deity Eno and bandmates Jonny Buckland, Guy Berryman and Will Champion to record a stripped-down, more acoustic collection in the eerie church...

The Word Verification System

It doesn't like Vanessa Hudgens;

She's apparently "Sudgengs"

Well then ...

I get fuck all comments on my blog ... especially on Epic F.C match reports ... they take a lot of time you know ...

Epic F.C Vs Sexii Skillz (Fags)

This week saw Epic F.C play, for the second time, the dark powers of Sexii Skillz(Fags).
Whilst we were thrashed(not as much as we could have been), we did manage to totally destroy them int he first half.
Conceding just two goals and managing to score one ourselves int he opening 15 minutes seemed to frustrate the faggots, causing them to bring far more to the table during the second half.

Use of the, now patented, UltraDefence-Premium formation, Epic F.C was able to force their opponents into constant pass backs and frustration shots that were easily saved by Joe or blocked.
Only a few times did the opposition manage to break through the iron-clad defending of Wongy, Jordan, Blaise and Conrad, with a variety of shots saved by the keeper.

The first goal was well struck from the faggot, and it proved too powerful at such a range for Joe to stop effectively. The keeper did get a glove to it, but he could only force the ball into the corner of the net.

The second goal from the faggots came from a rapid passing move that caught the defence off guard, allowing the faggot to shoot from the edge of the D. Even with Joe sliding out, and melting his knee in process, the ball went into the back of the net.

The one Epic F.C goal came when Joe rocketed the ball in between two faggots, where Blaise latched onto it and blasted it into the bottom corner.

As the players drank their water at half time, comments made by Faggots were overheard; "We're fukin' smashin' them, but they're fukin' defendin' ... innit".


Unfortunately, the side couldn't keep the defending prowess in the second half, stamina causing mistakes to come at crucial moments. An upside however, were the goals from Blaise and James, splitting apart the faggots, and pissing off the goalkeeperfaggot.

As the second half wore on, Epic F.C faced numerous challenges. These included the arm-flailingabout faggot, and the sluts sitting behind the goals.

These sluts were a continuing source of laughs from Joe, as every time a goal was scored, they would say stupid slutty things such as; "Haha" and "Well done".
Fortunately, they were shut up as Joe, while slowly picking the ball out of the back of the net said, "You know you're so pretty ... shame you hang out with these twats ... innit". Safe to say, the remained quietsluts for the rest of the game.

Last goal was bullshit ... short-fat-diving-faggot took the free kick about 2 metres ahead of where it was supposed to be taken.

In the end;

8-3

Goals:
Blaise - 2
James - 1

Ninjariffic Saves:
Joe - 1

Ninjariffic Blocks:
Conrad - 2
Blaise - 1

Notes -

We should play that formation every game ... awesome defending ... plenty of goal attempts ... Blaise can play out that central role really well.

Stamina was a problem, but it's probably because of the opposition and how awesome we played in the first half.

And now for some nerdy Warhammer 40K

Ok, so i'm the only person in the group who does it, but I thought I would share with you the wonders of Warhammer 40K, and in particular, conversions.
A conversion is when someone takes the original model kit, and then modifies it by adding or removing parts and tweaking the design of the model.

Here we see a Tau XV88 Broadside Battlesuit(Basically a big mobile gun turret with an alien sitting inside).
- The one on the top is the generic one straight from the box, and the one on the bottom is the conversion.

Quotes

Here is an interesting quote that I'm sure Wong will like;

"Small minds are easily filled with faith"
- Dawn of War, Soulstorm
(yes I have been playing it for a long time)

My Favourite Comedians

Here is a list, in order, of my favourite Stand Up comedians;

1 - Dane Cook
2 - Jeremy Hotz
3 - Kyle Cease (Like a Vagina!) - (you'd get it if you knew his stand up)
4 - Jeff Dunham
5 - Gina Yashere
6 - Mitch Fatel
7 - Stephen K. Amos
8 - John Pinette
9 - Dan Mintz
10 - Greg Proops

Who are your favourite comedians ... and we can do like a big list of comedians we should all see :)

Joes Guitar

Thanks to Miguels website, here is my awesomesupersweetgiganticordoritos guitar...

A variety of catnuggety cat like cats

That's all I have to say about fridges.

Epic F.C Vs (Some weird number thingy)

No need for a detailed match report.

We played pretty good in the first half. 2-3 at half time.
We played not so good in the second half.
Defending was a bit poor at times.
Joe was tired and could have done ALOT better.

Disappointing match.

7-3.

Blaise - 1
James - 2


James' second goal was fucking awesome. Ripped 2 players before blasting it home.

Conrad gets Joe's defender of the match, put his body on the line a lot and was well organised in defence.
Geoff also wins this award, from the other game Joe played.

Frank Lampard

What a dickhead! Here I go, sacraficing Torres to put him into my fantasy premier league team ... and what does he do? ... Goes out and gets himself injured, playing for England, like a retard!

What a JERK!

Screw you Frank ... it's not like England are going to win the World Cup, why sacrafice yourself for a lost cause !

Epic F.C Vs The Awesome

All the pre-match hype!
All the pre-match violence!
All the pre-match laughter!

Fun game. Epic F.C played really well, with Goalkeeper Joseph Blay holding off a barrage of shots to keep the Epic side in the game. Geoff 'lion' Keuk scored first, dribbling down the wing to blast a shot at the near post. The keeper deflected the shot, only to have it rebound across the goals and bounce into the far corner, past the last-ditch effort from Joe.

Epic F.C played well for the rest of the first half, and the scoreline reading 2 - 0 at half time, after a speedy blast from Miguel.


The second half was far more exciting. Again, the goalkeeper played well and kept his team in the game, until an unfortunate back pass lead to a penalty.
Initially, milkboy stepped up to shoot against colourblindboy. However, Conor Richards stepped up and calmly slotted the goal past Joe.

The next goal came from a fantastic effort from the penalty scorer, putting his side up 4 - 0.

Then with just a minute to go, the referee made a ridiculous decision. Geoff was struggling in a tackle with Matthew, and was able to just get his shot away from the edge of the D. It looked to be a goal, before a big glove from the keeper shot between his legs and stopped the ball, clearly 10 Cm in front.
How the referee saw it as a goal is beyond me. I'm not making this up either, it really wasn't a goal.

This actually evened out though, because Geoff had another shot disallowed, that was saved, then rebounded off the post, and actually went in. The referee called it to be not over the line. So Geoff' goals stayed the same.

A really physical match, Epic F.C played really well.

Joe had lots and lots of good saves. Pretty average throwouts though, could have done a lot better.
Conrad was super speedy, playing a very attacking style of game but still defending well.
James played a great all round game.
Blaise was a gun, as always.
Wong defended really well, stopping Geoff 'lion' Kuek on many occasions.
Jordan had a few decent efforts and played well up forward.

John Pinette

So hilarious !

Remember yesterday when I started doing the Chinese man impressions, "Eat Broccori"?

It's from this guy ...

Runaway Raindrop

Runaway Raindrop
Why so many tears
There's nothing left to hold you know
and you know you can't stay here

To earth you will fall soon
And from earth you will rise
With 'No' in your mouth now
But there's 'Yes' in your eyes

The cloudbursts are behind you
And a long fall ahead alone
Runaway Raindrop
You have to go home

Sometimes just for a moment, we are what we are
A bag full of second chances, overflowed and spilling out
Down, over and around the original burying ground
Where everyone gets even and everything is as clear as can be
Unending, unalone, into it you come and out of it you'll go
No more running, no more becoming
It takes a flake to know one and here you are
On the edge of yourself and ready to leap
Built to last only as long as snow upon the sea

Say what you will
Say it's all a dream
But if you stay where you are now
You may never leave

It's time to surrender
It's time to awake
Waiting is for buzzards
Wolves never wait

A wolf never waits...

The closer you look
The farther it looks away
You're moving on now
And they're here to stay

- Jonathan Donahue

Rove Live!

Mny of you already know this but Rove McManus has decided, after 10 years, to end his television show.
Announcing his retirement on his last show of 2009, Rove has decided he's finished.

NOOOOOOOOOO!

Just about everyone in Australia knows and loves Rove, he's been around since we were just starting to watch TV, when we were 6 or 7. We grew up with Rove and now we can get old remembering him.

Epic F.C Vs Velocity

This week saw the utterly brilliant Epic F.C play against an opposition that was seen playing last week. That opposition was Velocity.

A quiet hush moved over the crowd as the match began. Immediately, Epic F.C looked to attack, with plenty of attacking plays and movement in the opening few minutes. Velocity aslo looked very strong, living up to their suggestive name, with rapid counterattack plays.

As the first half wore on, neither team really looked like scoring, until Blaise Walker sped past two defenders, and blasted the ball through the keepers legs to put Epic F.C in front.

The joy was short lived however, with a momentary lapse in defence leaving super defender Conrad Loo with two opponents charging down the left wing. Conrad did well to hold up the first attacker, but was easily passed around, leading to a shot from the opposition that blazed past the keeper.

Keen to regain the lead, Epic F.C continued to push up the field, but to no avail. At the other end of the pitch, Goalkeeper Joe Blay was keeping his team in the game. After saving two shots easily an extremely powerful shot looked to be a goal before the keeper produced his best save to date.

A lunging dive, from the left post to the right, got the keeper airborne, before he got a glove to it and then promptly smashed his head into the post. Lucky for padding.

With just under a minute to go int he first half, Epic F.C continued to attack, producing a fantastic move that led to a goal from Jordan Edwards. Unfortunately, the goal was disallowed in a contentious decision that favoured the opposition.

As the second half began, Epic F.C certainly looked the better team. Swift attacking plays and resolute defending showed how the team as really come along in terms of cohesive unit work.

Finally the breakthrough came, a great through ball from a free kick by Conrad Loo put Blaise in a position to blast the ball straight past the keeper and put his side in front again.

At 2-1, Epic F.C looked to add more goals. However, a sting of shots led to nothing, with the Velocity goalkeeper doing well to stop shots from James, Wong and Blaise.

With just 6 minutes to go, Velocity made a rare play that got past Matthew Wong, the striker got his shot past the attempted block and around the goalkeeper to make the final 5 minutes interesting.

At 2-2, both teams pushed high up the field, in an all-or-nothing desperate attempt to take all the points from the game.

Unfortunately, neither team could get the goal and the match ended 2-2.

A game that Epic F.C could have won if it were not for some bad luck in front of goal.

Notes:

Great defending again this week!
Joes defender of the week: Conrad Loo - Heaps of blocks and did well to hold up play down the left hand side.

Everyone played really good up forward too, great plays and good shots.

Keep it up.

Watch Me

http://www.iheartradio.com/mediaplayer/?station=IHM-IP&action=stripped&item=8953037

RW Opening

In the spirit of awesome live music, I have been inspired to bring you the intro from Robbie Williams 2006 Close Encounters your ( Which I was lucky enough to go and see).
Robbie is famous for his fantastic and entertaining shows and this tour was probably his best one.
The song is,"Radio" and the concert was filmed at the largest performance in leeds, UK.

My Knees

Why am I so stupid?

This is not good ... it is destroying me.

They won't heal and they keep weeping plasma.

I'm going to die.

It's quite painful.

I hate it.

Why did I do such a stupid, stupid thing?

Epic F.C vs (Some random number thing)

This week saw Epic F.C play against an unknown entity in (Some random number thing F.C) - (It's a whole bunch of 3's and 5's that apparently make a word).

Before the match, goalkeeper Joseph Blay celebrated a lunch time hatrick rather stupidly, melting the skin off the sides of both of his knees, and much speculation ensued about his match fitness. However, heavy bandaging by his private medical professional, Danni Blay, allowed the keeper to play the game unhindered by his bleedingkneesofdeathandpainbrandonislactoseintollerantcatfourteen.
Other team news came with the addition of super-sub James Hastings, Emerson Brophy still sidelined after a knee dislocation.

The game started off fairly slowly, with both teams settling into passing rhythms. The few times attacks on goal were made by either team, the defence worked well the cut them out.

As the rest of the first half continued the game opened up. There were plenty of on-target shots made from both teams but both goalkeepers were able to make expected saves.

The half time break drew near, with the defence from Epic F.C standing strong to block several desperate shots from the opposition to keep the scoreline at 0-0 at half time.

The second half was far more exciting, with 6 goals. The opposition drew first blood after a quick shot from the side slipped past Joe Blay. However, the scores would be level again just 2 minutes later with a strong Epic F.C attack leading to a simple tap in for the team.
Epic F.C piled the pressure on again, with a second goal just a few minutes after equalising.
Unfortunately an equaliser for the opposition came, again from the same position, with a shot fired low just out of reach for the goalkeeper.
This sparked a few minutes of attacking play from the opposition, with the Joe forced to make three saves. Epic F.C again put themselves in front however, with a third goal. Before a fourth was put in by Blaise Walker to give the side some breathing space.

the final two minutes were very tense with Epic F.C trying for a bonus point goal while still defending superbly.
Finally the final siren came, with Epic F.C winning a very hard fought and well deserved match 4-2.

Notes:

Defence;

Blocking and defending was absolutely fantastic. Keep it up.
Joes defender of the match: Conrad Loo - Put his body on the line with some great blocking and did well to break up lots of attacks.

Offence;

When our attackers get the ball, they often run to the sides. This would work if we all were able to force the ball into the net from the side, like Blaise has done several times this season, all the time. However, we saw that the best goals we've scored this season have come from shots in front of goal. If you don't feel confident enough to dribble into a front on shooting position, it's a good idea to dribble to the side and then cut the ball back to edge of the D. we would then need someone to follow this up and a simple shot should be enough to add a goal to our tally.

Oh boys ...

It seems that our good friends over at Music Professio Mihi are neglecting to bring us their "100 Interesting Facts about Linkin Park". After my 100 Interesting Facts about Coldplay, I was hoping for some kind of CHALLENGE to be completed, but it seems that Mr Wong and Mr Kuek are reluctant to accept.

Blogging from the Wii

Totally awesome, this post has been typed, complete with time consumation, whilst on the internet browser available on the Wii.

Suck it PS3 . . .
Cue; Dumb, ignorant, consumerist, anti-progressive comment(s) from Tom

:)
Gosh the Wii is awesome

Wise Words

" An octopus is an octopus, and will remain and octopus. So it cannot become a dog"
- Some Asian guy that was interviewed about Virtua Fighter 5

Anyone want it?

I have recently acquired a copy of the, "Call of Duty: World at War" PlayMagazine Complete Game Guide.

It basically walks through all the missions and has a whole bunch of tips and stuff to do with the game.

I have no use for it but I know that some of our friends out there play games like this (Call of Duty/Medal of Honour)so if you want it you can have it.

First comment on this post can have it.

Epic F.C vs 10 Nil

This week saw both our teams, (Epic F.C and TheAwesome), play in games against very good opposition and come away with just one goal and a loss each. With TheaAwesome previously losing their match, Epic F.C felt a little better about their 8-0 loss to Sexii Skilz(fags).

As the players arrived, crucial news arrived that first-time striker Blaise Walker had fallen ill and was unable to play. Thankfully, loan player Conor Richards had arrived with Miguel Periera. The pair graciously agreed to play for the depleted team.

As the match began, Miguel looked hungry to score after a frustrating loss earlier in the evening. 10Nil seemed to be skilled, and played well during the first half. Epic F.C defended fairly well, with Joe Blay only being forced to make 3 saves, one a near post, one a front on stop and one a run-and-block, in the first half.

Epic F.C continued to attack, and the breakthrough finally came, with Miguel being set up by Jordan Edwards to smack home the first goal.

The celebrations were short lived however, as 10Nil immediately began to attack. Speedy runs kept the Epic F.C defense on their toes however Conrad Loo was passed the ball, only to be mauled by three 10Nil players. The defender did well to hold off the attacks, but eventually the ball spilt out and the 10Nil striker hit a close range shot into the net, just before half time.

The second half started, and Epic F.C looked to build on a fairly decent first half. 10Nil began to mark players, making it difficult to find passing avenues for the entire team. This led to more possession in the defensive half for Epic F.C, and hence limited scoring chances.

After 10 minutes of hard and tight football, 10Nil began to overrun Epic F.C. A slick pass caught Jordan Edwards off guard, and allowed a 10Nil player to shoot unopposed directly on the edge of the D.

The game continued in the fashion, with Joe Blay conceding a bad goal to make the score 3-1 before 10Nil won possession of a Conor Richards shot and ran the ball into a scoring position, where the ball was put into the net past a block from Matthew Wong and the dive from Joe Blay.

Epic F.C became more frustrated, with 10Nil marking up and stopping any sort of attacking play. The Epic F.C defense played fairly well, with the only shot in the last 7 minutes hitting the post due to strong pressure from Matthew Wong.


Notes;

Stamina - We seem to always play really well in the first half, and then fall down in the second. We need to perhaps have some sort of energy boost at half time to prepare for the second half. Put some sugar in your water bottles for a short burst in the second half. Maybe eat a banana before the match. We'll keep on the lookout for some other alternatives to this problem further in the week. (Maybe some energy drinks or something).

Movement - Although this team was marking up to prevent passes, we still need to work on moving around. Especially when we get a bit tired. There is no point in passing it back to me, when I then don't have anyone who is running forward to pass it to. I see it as a waste if I am forced to roll it out to someone in our own half.
In addition to just my throw outs, we just in general have to work on moving about to provide passing options.

1 - Miguels awesome volley on the run in the first half.
2 - Conrads 3 shots across the face of goals that were unlucky to not provide assists or goals.
3 - Matthews constant and fearless blocks. Awesome.
4 - Conors weird tick-tock thingy he did about a thousand times in a row to piss off that 10Nil player.
5 - Joe making a save, to then have the ball flick up and hit him in the face just as the half time siren sounded.
6 - Jordans strong attacking passing. Really good.

Thanks to Ashlyn, Emerson and Brittany for coming down and supporting us.
Also, Special thanks to Conor and Miguel, who played for us despite having previously played, from what I hear, a very tiring and physical match.

Word Verification Mysteries #3

Does the system want a Burger and Fries combo for $2.50?

Hamish and Andy podcast

Yeah Conor, you do realise that you can download the Hamish and Andy show podcast from hamishandandy.com or iTunes everyday for free right?

Platinum Basset

For those who listen to Hamish & Andy on the radio/podcast, you would know that every Friday a regular segment on the show occurs which features Hamish Blake reading out a comic strip known as "Fred Basset".

Andy however, does not like the cartoon and believes that the people do not want it broadcast. Henceforth, every time the segment occurs, Andy constructs some sort of challenge with which to hinder/disallow Hamish to read the comic.

The opening title to the segment begins with some form of heavy rock song with the lyrics, "You've gotta fight! For your right!", before being interrupted by Hamish, "Listen to Fred Basset on the radio".

Recent challenges by Andy have been;


Andy sent a male stripper to Hamish' mum's house. Hamish was forced to read the cartoon while listening to his mother receive a lap dance.

Andy organised several schoolgirls to throw 144 eggs at Hamish as he read the comic, while standing on the roof.

Hamish was forced to eat, "Trappey's Bull Louisiana Hot Sauce", the hottest sauce in Mississippi.

Andy beat Hamish repeatedly with boxing gloves on while he read the cartoon.

Andy had Hamish hypnotised so that he 1 - Forgot the name of the dog(Fred Basset) 2 - every time he heard a hand clap he barked 3 - Became sexually attracted to Andy and 4 - Sing in "Martian Language"

Andy made Hamish run naked around the camper van during the caravan of courage. However, Andy closed and locked the door before Hamish had returned.

Andy organised for Hamish to receive a prostate examination while he read the cartoon.

Andy covered Hamish with dog food and released 50 Basset Hounds.

Hamish was electrocuted in the face.

Although he is regularly hindered, Hamish always manages to read the comic. When he has done this, the outro music begins. "P-P-P-P-Platinum Basset ... Basset"

Word Generator Mysteries #2

PES

I have been playing PES so much I'm going crosseyed and still beating teams.

Torres is a gun.
Newly signed striker with an awesome name("Fred") is turing out to be super awesome.
I keep telling everyone, get yourself a piece of "Agi Pakarani".
Shwarz is an incredible player for 19.

Arshavin is really shit in PES 6 ... maybe it's time to upgrade 0_0

Post #50

Boy this is exciting ...

Epic F.C VS Sexii Skilz(Fags)

Well this game week saw Epic F.C play against the little jewrats known as Sexii Skilz(fags).

The game didn't go according to plan, with Emersons injury rattling the team, and lack of consistency leading to a poor loss by the club.

Many shots were had by forwards Blaise and Jordan, who both were unlucky at times, and also under plenty of pressure from the opposition. Matthew and Conrad were also unlucky at times, with the ball not dropping favourably and being caught off guard by swift attacking play.

The match wouldn't have been all that bad, if it hadn't had been for the courageous Emerson getting injured. A spectacular block that stopped an exceedingly powerful shot ending his match (and probably further matches, which is shitty cos he was just getting settled into Indoor) after just 10 minutes. This lead to no substitutions, meaning our squad was under enormous pressure for most of the game.

The opposition were also little shits.

Cocky and arrogant, they always had a fuckedupshit look on their faces. Especially the little poof who kept diving. Seriously, this idiot would just leap into the air extravagantly as soon as he lost the ball. No free kicks for you.

Epic F.C played a pretty competitive match for the first half, having many opportunities and conceding 3 goals. However as the second half progressed, stamina became a factor. As the clock wore down to about 12 minutes remaining the lack of subs took it's toll, leading to 4 of the goals being conceded.

The match ended 8 - 0.

Highlights included;

1 - Blaise volleying from everywhere he could
2 - Jordans two fantastic shots that were unlucky to hit the bar and get saved
3 - Matthews crazymofo defending
4 - Emersons screams of support from the sidelines
5 - Joe almost braking his shoulder when slamming into the post, only to still concede to a shit
6 - Conrads crazy toepunt passing that led to many shooting chances

Notes;

Defence - A bit unlucky due to no subs so we had lots of pressure, however we did still get out passed on occasions that led to either shots and/or goals. Make sure you are aware of your opponents. Also, put a foot in when they try to hold attacking play up, they're obviously just waiting for a pass, so stop them in their tracks.

Forwards - Did really well, despite not actually scoring. Lots of good shots when you had the chances, but it was a bit hard because of the little shits who kept intercepting like little shits.

The Oracle Dislikes Paramore

For those who do not know, Coldplay have a feature on their website which allows fans to ask direct questions to an entity known only as, "The Oracle". The Oracle then selects several questions and answers them.

Recently, a question about Paramore was asked. This is how it went down;

October 21, 2009 - submitted by Enzo, Brazil

Q. Hi Oracle, are you familiar with Paramore? Because I recently listened to their new album and there is a song: The Only Exception. I think it is similar to the older Coldplay's songs. It's my opinion of course, others maybe won't find it similar. I also would like to ask you how close you are to Chris and the others?

The Oracle replies:

I am aware of Paramore and also the track you mention. As it starts with an acoustic guitar being strummed in a similar vein to Yellow I can see why you mention it. I think that's where the similarity ends if I'm honest.


As you can see from the bluntness of The Oracle' answer, he seems to dislike Paramore, rendering me helpless to say only this;

"Paramore are shit"

The Cats are DEAD

It is now official;

There are now currently 0 cats.
No longer do the 84 live.
Blaise flew to Peru where he shot each individual cat.
Cat #42 required 2 bullets as it dodged the first at point blank range.

There are 0 cats.
Blaise used 85 bullets.

Everybody Lova Da Coldplay

In my worldly endeavours to bring COLDPLAY to everybody I have been searching through all songs to find tracks that I believe "Most" people would appreciate. So in this episode, we take a look at the COLDPLAY tracks from the album X&Y that would please those who are into bands such as, "Paramore".


1 - "Square One" - X&Y - This track starts off a little oddly, but strong overlaying guitar riffs and heavy bass lines make this song very, "Paramore - ish".

2 - "White Shadows" - X&Y - White Shadows is one of my favourite COLDPLAY songs. Quite a speedy song, this track incorporates strong guitar riffs and drumming to create a cool and unique sound.

3 - "Low" - X&Y - Very interesting track, Low is a fusion of true alternative rock and the fresh sounds that created the album, "X&Y".


So go forth and listen, ye who love music, go forth and hear the wonderful sounds of COLDPLAY.

SHOCK< HORROR

So today, once I arrived home, I began to play with Dexter the Chihuahua. Now, being Mexican and all, Dexter likes to run superfast up and down the hallway. I decide to battle him in a war of chasey.

While I was flogging his little immigrant ass, running as fast as a horny bull towards a hot bovine babe, I proceeded to trip over myself, in an attempt to not squash him. This then caused me to fall, while twisting in an anti-clockwise direction, meaning my ankle was twisted in the process.

As the mighty had fallen, imminent pain rushed to the injured area. While this happened Dexter attempted to help, by jumping on top of my writhing body in celebration of his victory.

For about an hour, I was too scared to walk on it, fearing the worst ... which meant no indoor! :O

However, after falling again whilst attempting to hop towards my bedroom, I had to use the foot again to get up.

I'm pleased to say that I am not injured, and my ankle was a bitch for scaring me.

Good

You know whats good ... coming home and just relaxing on your bed while listening to music ... so calming ... so happy ... so ....

...

SUPERFREAKINGAWESOMECATBLANKETEPISODEFOREMANPIGHAMMERMOFOBRANDONSHOULDDRINKMILKHAHAHE'S LACTOSEINTOLLERANTANDI'MCOLOURBLIND AWESOME !!

next to my new SWEET COLDPLAY poster !

Thanks Wongy/Liss

Bug Pokemon Lineup - Original 151

Due to Thomas' request, I have decided to also create a super Bug Type lineup from just the original 151 Pokemon(Even though I believe that the original sets from both the Kanto and the Johto region are the best, all the others are kind of repetitive).

1 - Beedrill
2 - Venomoth
3 - Parasect
4 - Pinsir
5 - Scyther
6 - Butterfree

Oh wait Tom, there were only 6 fully evolved/ single evolution Bug Types in the original 151 ... henceforth creating a Bug Type list from the first 151 is redundant ... Jackass.

Greatest Bug Pokemon Lineup

For all those fellow Bug Type enthusiasts out there(You know who you are), I thought that I, Bug Master Joe, would give you a rundown of the best 6 Bug Type Pokemon party.

1 - Beedrill - Bug/Posion
2 - Scyther -Bug/Flying
3 - Ariados - Bug/Posion
4 - Armaldo - Rock/Bug
5 - Yanmega - Bug/Flying
6 - Masquerain - Bug/Flying

Beedrill is just superawesome.
Scyther offers extreme speed with strong attacks.
Ariados is surprisingly very strong. Plus he looks sweet!
Armaldo is super powerful.
Yanmega is really hard to get but it pays off because he is scarily strong.
Masquerain actually evolves from Surskit, a Bug/Water pokemon, meaning that he can know water type moves. This is very handy.

Bug Pokemon are the greatest.

Prediction

Next week both Epic F.C and The Awesomes(fail) will be playing at the same times but against different opposition.

Henceforth, I predict that the week after, October 30 will be the date of the highly anticipated clash between Epic F.C and The Awesomes(fail).

Get ready boys.

Epic F.C VS The Uncos

This week saw Epic F.C play against, "The Uncos". And they were exactly that.

Similar to The Awesomes(fail)' match report, there is hardly much to say about the match.

From the very beginning Epic F.C were on top, with goals and shots coming in from all angles from practically everyone in the team bar Joe.

A brilliant display from the new, "Rotational defense-offense" system meant that everyone got to have their opportunities up forward, and we always had at least 1 fresh man in both offense and defense.

Everyone had a fantastic game and we completely dominated. Our defense was brilliant, led by Matthew Wong, meaning that we could work the ball through the midfield lots and lots of times to create shots on goal. We dominated this game to such an extent that I can't even remember how the game went on chronologically. It was all pretty much the same.
So for the event list, I can't even begin to imagine how many shots Epic F.C had, I've just listed the goals from Epic F.C , and the on-target shots from, "The Uncos".

Play went;

Goal(Epic F.C)
Goal(Epic F.C)
Goal(Epic F.C)
Goal(Epic F.C)
Shot(The Uncos) - The only good shot, required a diving save
Goal(Epic F.C)
Shot(The Uncos) - Taken straight after kick off in frustration. On target but easily caught by Joe
Goal(Epic F.C)

HT

Goal(Epic F.C)
Goal(Epic F.C)
Shot(The Uncos) - From the side, hit Joe in the chest and winded him, defense was so dominant Joe had recovered for about 5 minutes before the next, off target, shot came in
Goal(Epic F.C)
Goal(Epic F.C)

FT

Scorers;
Blaise - 4
Emerson - 4
Jordan - 1
Matthew - 1(2/5)

Epic F.C

We came.We destroyed.We conquered.
We defended.We attacked.We owned.

10 - 0
Matthew Wong gets my vote for Man Of The Match.

Match report pending ...

Well then ...

-20 = -20
16 - 36 = 25 - 45
42 - (4)(9)= 52 - (5)(9)
42 - (4)(9) + 81/4 = 52 - (5)(9) + 81/4
42-2(4)(9/2)+(9/2)2=52-2(5)(9/2)+(9/2)2
(4 - 9/2)2 = (5 - 9/2)2
4 - 9/2 = 5 - 9/2
4 = 5
4 - 4 = 5 - 4

Therefore
0 = 1

Umm ...

Challenge

I now challenge Matthew/Geoffry over at Musicprofessiomihi to bring us, "100 Interesting Facts About Linkin Park".

100 Interesting Facts About Coldplay

1. There are 5 different versions of the song, "Lost!". "Lost+", "Lost@", "Lost?", "Lost-" and "Lost!".
2. During a concert in Australia on the Viva La Vida tour, lead singer Chris Martin ripped his pants live onstage.
3. The first official Coldplay song is called, "Ode to Deodorant". It was written as a joke.
4. In 2008, a group of female fans commented on the way Chris Martin' voice sounded on a video posted on Youtube of the song, "Gravity". The long list of comments ended with a unanimous decision that his voice, "Flows like honey".
5. Chris Martin' father is an accountant.
6. The great, great grandfather of Chris Martin was the same man who convinced English Parliament to introduce daylight savings.
7. Coldplay borrowed their band name from another band, who didn't want it anymore because they found it too depressing.
8. Coldplay might have been called, "Starfish" or "Stephanie Green"
9. The first ever Coldplay recordings took place in 1998, culminating in the EP, "Safety".
10. Only 500 copies of this were ever produced.
11. Nowdays, the "Safety" EP sells for prices ranging from, 80 to 300 dollars.
12. Coldplay originally signed to a small record label called, "Fierce Panda".
13. Once Coldplay had signed to EMI records, they began to produce their 3rd EP, "The Blue Room".
14. During these recordings, drummer Will Champion walked out on the band for a week.
15. Chris Martin, a non-drinker, responded by becoming highly intoxicated.
16. Coldplay created a rule for themselves that states, "Any member of the band caught using hard drugs will be dismissed immediately".
17. The first hit single from Coldplay was the song, "Shiver", making it to #35 in the charts.
18. The film clip to the song, "Yellow" is not what it is meant to be. The rain restricted recording and so the music video was filmed in just 20 minutes.
19. Chris Martin, while writing "Yellow", noticed the phonebook, "The Yellow Pages" and decided that the word,"Yellow" fit nicely.
20. Coldplay' debut album was originally going to be named, "Don't Panic" and then, "Yellow.
21. However, they changed this to, "Parachutes" in order to combat the reputation that they were depressing. They used a parachute as a metaphor, as in when you are falling, a parachute brings you gently back down.
22. In it's first 6 months, "Parachutes" had sold 1.6 million copies in England alone. With 5 million sold worldwide. EMI had predicted just forty thousand.
23. The Coca - Cola company asked Coldplay if they could use the song, "Trouble" in a TV advertisement for Diet Coke.
24. The company that makes Gatorade reportedly offered Coldplay 9 Million dollars to use the song "Yellow" in one of their commercials.
25. Coldplay rejected both offers.
26. In 1999, Chris Martin began writing the song, "In My Place". That song was then dusted off and became the first single off the 2002 album, "A Rush of Blood to the Head".
27. While Chris Martin was recording the vocals for, "In My Place", a man named, Ian Mccullough from the band, 'Echo and the Bunnymen", was sitting on a stool next to him.
28. He was drinking red wine.
29. Coldplay' third album, "X&Y", sold over 8.1 Million copies in its first year.
30. Chris Martin says that he wrote the song, "Speed of Sound", in an attempt to capture all his feelings from the birth of his daughter, Apple.
31. The song, "Fix You" was written as a present to Chris Martin' wife after the death of her father.
32. It is her fathers keyboard that can be heard in the original recording.
33. Coldplay were once called, "The most insufferable band of the decade", in an article from The New York Times.
34. Coldplay have a private recording studio at their band headquarters called, "The Bakery"
35. The title of Coldplay' fourth studio album, "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends", was adapted from a painting by a Mexican artist by the name of Frida Kahlo.
36. The painting was a still life of 7 watermelons.
37. The artwork for the album was taken from a painting by 19th century artist, Eugene Delacroix. The painting was called, "Liberty Leading the People".
38. Coldplay refer to their first three albums, "Parachutes", "A Rush of Blood to the Head" and "X&Y" as a trilogy.
39. The first single from the album, "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends" was "Violet Hill".
40. The song, "Violet Hill" was given away for free for one week. It was downloaded more than 2 Million times.
41. By June the 30th, "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends" was the most downloaded album in history.
42. During Coldplay', "Viva La Vida" tour a regular feature from their website was a tour blog, written by one of the roadies. This person went only by the name of, "Roadie #42", no doubt a reference to the Coldplay song, "42".
43. For their "Viva La Vida" tour, Coldplay' bass guitarist Guy Berryman made all the clothing.
44. Chris Martin has referred to Coldplays guitarist, Jonny Buckland, as his, "Guitar Hero".
45. There are two official music videos for the song, "Viva La Vida".
46. There are also two official music videos for, "Violet Hill".
47. Chris Martin is close friends with actor Simon Pegg
48. Coldplay claim to have fifth member, Phil Harvey. Nicknamed, "The elusive 5th member", Phil Harvey is never seen, even in photographs of him, another member of the band is always covering his face.
49. For the music video to the song, "The Scientist", Chris Martin had to learn to sing the song backwards.
50. The inside cover for the album, "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends", states that the album was, "Recorded in a bakery, a nunnery, a magic shop, a church".
51. The inside cover for the album, "A Rush of Blood to The Head", states that, 'The Scientist is Dan".
52. During Coldplay' tour to promote their album, "A Rush of Blood to The Head", a roadie by the name of Matt McGinn performed additional guitar during the songs, "Yellow" and "The Scientist".
53. Matt McGinn also wrote a book about his experiences on the road with Coldplay.
54. Three Coldplay songs have been parodied by MADTV. "The Scientist", "Viva La Vida" and "Speed of Sound" were performed on the show as, "The Narcissist", "Viva La Cheata" and "I'm the Most Important Part of Coldplay" respectively.
55. Coldplay released a small side album, "LeftRightLeftRightLeft" as part of a promotion to their, "Viva La Vida" tour. The 9-Track live compilation featured recordings of songs from the tour. It was put up free for download from Coldplay.com and a hard copy was also given away free at concerts for most of the tour.
56. The music video for the song, "The Hardest Part", uses a clip from a short-lived 80s program "Attitudes" on the Lifetime network, and has the band digitally inserted. The band plays beside a stage where an 84 year old woman, with the aid of a 25 year old man, performs incredible feats of athleticism, gymnastics and flexibility despite her age.
57. The song, "Don't Panic", was originally released on "The Blue Room" EP. However there are many differences between that version of the song and the version released on the album, "Parachutes".
58. The 13th of January is known amongst Coldplay fans as St.Odes day. It is to commemorate the the 13th of January, 2006, where a fan, who had purchased an original , "Ode to Deodorant" demo tape from Ebay, 'leaked' the song onto the Internet.
59. The song, "How You See The World", is only available in Japan. However a second version fo the song, "How You See The World No.2", was recorded with re-written lyrics for the charity album, "Help: A Day in The Life".
60. The blocks from the cover art for the album, "X&Y", are the Baudot Code-encoding. A 5 bit alphanumerical code used by telegraphs.
61. Due to an error, the cover of the album does not translate from Baudot Code as "X&Y", but rather "X96".
62. At the conclusion of the final concert on the, "Viva La Vida" tour, the section of Coldplay' official website that listed upcoming show dates was wiped clean and replaced with the words, "Hasta La Vista".
63. In 2003, the song, "Clocks" was used in a trailer for the film, "Peter Pan". The song did not actually feature in the film however.
64. There are three unofficial collections of Coldplay music. "Castles", "A Rush of B-sides to Your Head" and "After After Before".
65. In 2001 Coldplay released a 2-Track Christmas album entitled, "Mince Spies". Only 1000 copies were ever produced.
66. "Mince Spies" was given away to members of the Coldplay fan club previous to the release of, "Parachutes".
67. For the music video to the song, "Life in Technicolor ii", four puppets were made in the shape of the four members of Coldplay.
68. During the, "Viva La Vida" tour, these four puppets were photographed at various tourist attractions and random places in the city or area that the band was currently performing in.
69. Chirs Martin plays a role in the popular film, "Shaun of the Dead" as both a zombie wearing a yellow cap and himself.
70. Jonny Buckland also appears in the film as himself.
71. Before one of their live performances on the, "Viva La Vida" tour, the band were provided with a Beef Stroganoff for their dinner. However, because Chris Martin is a vegetarian, he had to be catered for seperatley.
72. Coldplay have released 20 singles.
73. At the 2005 MTV European Music Awards, a backstage sketch featured Borat stealing Chris Martin' trousers and giving them to a little boy.
74. In the "Twisted Logic" tour, during the song, "Talk", Chris Martin would take the mobile phone of an audience member and sing to the person on the other end of the line.
75. On the live version of, "Clocks" featured on the album, "LeftRightLeftRightLeft", Chris Martin sings the numbers 1 - 4 in spanish. I.E - "uno, dos, tres, cuatro".
76. The, "Live 2003" DVD was filmed at the Horden Pavilion in Sydney, Australia on July 21 and 22, 2003.
77. During the, "Rush of Blood to The Head" tour, Jonny Buckland played the harmonica during the performance of, "Don't Panic".
78. Jonny Buckland also then threw his harmonica into the crowd at the conclusion of the song.
79. An acoustic recording of the song, "Lovers in Japan", was given away exclusivley to those who had pre-ordered the album, "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends" via iTunes.
80. Just before the band took to the stage during the, "Viva La Vida" tour, the instrumental song, "The Blue Danube" by Strauss is played. For those of you who don't know, thats the song that goes like, "Duh Duh Duh Duh Duh, ne ne, ne ne, Duh Duh Duh Duh Duh, ne ne, ne ne" - Yeah it's best just tolook it up youtube it.
81. In an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, Chris Martin commented on the common, anti-coldplay statement, "You know how I know you're gay? You listen to Coldplay". The singer said that he would be offended if Coldplay' music only appealed to one demographic of people.
82. The song, "Clocks" was only added to the album, "A Rush of Blood to The Head" at the last minute.
83. Coldplay have dedicated the album, "Parachutes" to Sara Champion. Sara is the deceased mother of drummer, William Champion.
84. In an interview on Rove Live, Chris Martin described William Champion as, "The sporty one".
85. The album cover for, "Parachutes" is a photograph of a globe that was personally taken by the band with a disposable Kodak camera.
86. The same globe featured in the music videos for, "Shiver" and "Don't Panic".
87. During 2006 a new album for the, "Rockabye Baby!" series was released. It was titled, "Lullaby Renditions of Coldplay" and featured lullaby versions of songs such as, "Clocks" and "Yellow".
88. Before Coldplay, guitarist Jonny Buckland and singer Chris Martin created a group together called, "Pectoralz"
89. The hidden track, "The escapist" from the album, "Viva La Vaida or death and All His Friends" was origonally set to be included as a track in it's own right and named, "Song for the Escapist".
90. Coldplay currently have 5 unreleased songs.
91. Despite being named, "Don't Panic", the actual words, "Don't Panic" do not appear in the song.
92. "Viva La Vida" and "The Scientist" also fit into this category.
93. Coldplay give 15% of all band profits to charity.
94. In July 2003, Chris Martin was arrested in Australia for attacking a photogropher in the street.
95. Coldplay's sound engineer, Dan Green, shares a writing credit on the song, "A Spell A Rebel Yell"
96. In December 2003, readers of Rolling Stone magazine chose Coldplay as both best artist and the best band of the year.
97. To kick off their, "Viva La Vida" tour, Coldplay played a small, free show outside the BBC Television Centre.
98. Chris MArtin made a geust appearance during season 2 of, "The Extras"
99. Coldplay have 99 official, studio recorded, songs including B-Sides and unreleased songs.
100. Joseph Blay' favourite Coldplay song of all time is, "The Hardest Part".

Epic F.C Wind Up

Trojans 5 - 2 Epic F.C

Finally Indoor began, after much speculation of transfers, traitorous jerks, cheeseeaters and cats, Epic F.C began their 2nd 2009 Indoor Soccer campaign.

This seasons squad had been significantly re-vamped, with the departure of James Hastings(On loan to WJCC and The Awesomes(fail) ) and, Kurtis Bruce ( Jew duty) and Miguel, Miggy P, Periera ( Traitorous Manager, Owner and Player of/for The Awesomes(fail) ), several new additions were at hand for the squad.

Blaise Walker, after much hype and publicity, was added to the team, in addition to Emerson Brophy and Jordan Edwards. This left the team with a strong and dynamic wealth of attacking and defensive options, causing confusion at the starting gates, with several people unaware of their actual positions for the match. This was sorted pre-match, and the game was underway.

The first five minutes flew by, with neither team really threatening on goal, with all players seemingly happy to ease into the tempo of the match. The first blow was struck after six minutes, with a simple shot from the side by Blaise easily collected by the opposition keeper. Following that, several more shots were fired by the forwards of Epic F.C, to no avail.

At 9 minutes, The Trojans began to cement their attacking plays, firing approximately 3 - 4 shots within 2 minutes, but each one was under pressure from our defence, and as such required nothing special of Joe.

After eleven minutes, an unfortunate positioning error lead to three Epic F.C players hanging all together to the right, causing Conrad Loo to need to cover two Trojan players. This lead to a simple build up by the opposition, drawing Conrad to the middle man, before passing to an unmarked player who easily slid it past the keeper for the edge of the circle.

At this point, Epic F.C became more eager to venture forward, sacrificing defence for more forward plays. This worked well to provide more opportunities, with on-target shots fired from Blaise Walker and Jordan Edwards and a fantastic curling shot from Emerson Brophy all saved by the keeper. However, this lead to a gap in the defence, and a quick break from The Trojans left Matthew Wong and Conrad Loo with some desperate defending to do. Unfortunately, despite their efforts, the shot from The Trojans player managed to be on target,and a woeful dive from Joe Blay let the second goal slip in.

It was half time, and Conrad new that the boys needed a bit of a work up. The players were spoken to, and we stepped back onto the pitch, refreshed and ready for a second half.

The first few minutes ebbed and flowed between strong Epic F.C build up without any concise finishing, and quick Trojan plays that required saves, and wasted opportunities for the opposition, thanks to some great pressure defence.

With just twelve minutes left on the clock, Epic F.C needed someone to stand up. And someone did indeed. Some good passing from Jordan Edwards had forced The Trojans back to defend in numbers, but a quick pass back by Blaise Walker to Matthew Wong allowed the previously goalless defender enough time and space to set his shot bound for the upper left hand corner. There was no stopping it, The Trojans keeper flailing about like a dying fish, before the ball smacked into the net.

The stage was set, all that was left to do now was pull back another goal and the game was there for the taking. We set about our task strongly, with good attacking play leading to shots form Blaise Walker and Jordan Edwards. The Trojans struck back quickly, however, with a slick passing move getting around Emerson Brophy and a powerful shot from the side, getting through the hand of the keeper and into the goals.

At 3 - 1 and with only ten minutes remaining, we knew we had to act fast if we wanted to win this game back. Moving up forward, Epic F.C maneuvered and dribbled their way into several goalbound opportunities, another curler from Emerson was notable, as was a powerful volley from the halfway line from Blaise Walker.

After eight minutes of this attacking play, it finally payed off. Good movement down the right hand side by Conrad and Matthew, had allowed for Jordan to be in a shooting position, as he received the ball, he was immediately put under pressure, as such he passed it swiftly to Blaise, who wasted no time in skimming the ball into the back of the net.

Hope was restored, but not for long. Epic F.C continued the attacking runs, but sturdy defence for a solid amount of time had meant that less opportunities for goals had left us with only three minutes with which to score.

But to no avail, as penetrating runs from The Trojans led to a diving save from Joe, that spilt out of the area to a Trojans player, who popped the ball into the goals.

Then as time wore on and only one minute remained, another quick break from the Trojans led to another goal. Emerson Brophy desperately attempted to stunt the pace of his opponent, but in the end, his tackle and then follow up backwards tackle were no match for the quick feet of his opponent, who slipped the ball past a sliding Joe. Seconds after the goal Joe, who had so much momentum from sliding, crashed into the goalscorer. The two players both got back up and play continued for the next forty-five seconds, with The Trojans happy to simply defend in numbers.

A disappointing match in the end for Epic F.C, who had their opportunities and worked hard to bring the game back within reach.

Game notes;

1- As Conrad nicley said, and I yelled mid-match, we must always remember to have at least two players in defence. In addition to this, Joe has also requested that he have at least one of his, as he calls them, "Main Men". That is, a player who often plays in defence for the team and understands the otherwise incoherent instructions from Joe.
At the moment Joe has requested Matthew Wong and Conrad Loo to interchange this role as they see fit throughout the course of the season and matches.

2 - Take chances on shots. We saw in that match, when Emerson ventured forward he took shots as he saw fit, and had two great on target curlers that required saves. Don't be afraid to shoot from a distance if you think you can get it right. Too many times, players had opportunities to shoot and decided against it. I'm not saying we should all shoot all the time, because sometimes we had opportunities to shoot that just weren't viable as scoring chances. But don't be afraid to take the shot.

That's all for this weeks game analysis, goodbye and goodnight.

Expectations For Indoor

This Friday marks the begining of a new Indoor season, with that in mind, let's look at my expectations for this season;

Team list - Epic F.C

GK - Joe Blay
DF/MF(Although he will be looking to venture up foward this season) - Matthew Wong
DF/MF/FW - Emerson Brophy
MF/FW - Blaise Walker
DF/FW - Conrad Loo
MF/FW - Jordan Edwards

Matthew and Conrad will both be looking to improve on a previous fantastic season, adding more goals and tackles this season.
Blaise, as we all know, will be a gun up foward, with his extreme pace, volleying, agility and power.
Emerson will be searching to find his feet this season, but already having previous experience in the physical game of hockey, he won't find it too hard to adapt. With special skills such as the, "Soft Roll" call and the patented, "Backwards Tackle", Emerson looks to be a promising and deadly addition to the squad.
Jordan looks to be the surprise package this season. Pace and physical presence will be the key to his succes, and with proven scoring ability, Jordan looks set to become an important foward option.
Joe will, of course, never concede to the, "Failteam". Non-Fail oppositions beware, Joe will be armed with new gloves that won't break and pants that won't melt this season ! Get ready for sliding, diving action.

Thats all for now, obviously, there will be further indoor updates, and a good amount of Failteam sledging when that fixture arrives.

I'm off to practice diving now, considering I haven't done it for about 4 weeks.

EDIT; Brandon should eat some cheese

AFL Trade Week - Update 2 - Another New Saint

Yet again this week St.Kilda have snagged another quality midfielder, this time from the Fremantle Dockers.

Brett Peake is now a Saint after Fremantle agreed to trade the 26-year-old late on Wednesday.
St Kilda will part with its third-round NAB AFL Draft selection (No.48 overall) to secure the deal.

I like it how St.Kilda aren't losing established players, just QUALITY YOUNG TALENT YOU BAFOONS!! But Brett Peake is a gun so I suppose it's not all that bad.

No news yet on Luke Ball, so Collingwood better act fast.

Bye for now.

New Saint - AFL Trade Week

Well all the action of the this AFL season is finally coming to a close, with the always action packed Trade Week before the National Draft. This is the only time of the year in AFL where players can be moved to different clubs via;

A) Trading of other players
B)Trading of National Draft Picks

C)Contract perks and money deals

Obviously because I'm a St.Kilda football club fan, I will be updating the actions of the St.Kilda football club during this time for your enjoyment;

CONOR :D - St.Kilda have traded their 16th priority draft pick to Essendon for Andrew Lovett. Thats right, the speedy, former Essendon, on-baller who can provide an extra dimension in games is now a Saint.

In other St.Kilda Trade Week news, former captain Luke Ball has rejected a three-year contract with the Saints and has requested to be traded to Collingwood.

Thats all for now, hopefully St.Kilda will get a quality player from the Magpies, obviously Bally is a gun so we certainly won't be giving him up for peanuts.

What I have watched this week so far -

Movies:

The Boat That Rocked
UP

Tv Shows:(In their entirety)

Seinfeld season 3
Seinfeld season 4
Seinfeld season 5
That 70's Show season 1
That 70's Show season 2
Dexter season 1 (Again :) )

Other:

Coldplay Live 2003


As you can see I've been doing some very hard work this week ...

UMM ...

Well ...

Perhaps the word verification system needs a bit of a tune up ...

Awesome

So at Haywoods party;

The highlight of the party was, Emerson and I's thumping rendition of Snow Patrol', "Chasing Cars". The fantastic vocal cyclone that was us, created an incredible feeling, prompting this dialouge, mid-song;

Joe: "This is so awesome"!
Emerson: "I know"!

What great harmonies, pretty sure we should do it again!

Jeremy Hotz

He's so funny it's incredible ...

One of the best stand up comedians I have ever seen. His format is really original and unique, he pretty much stands there, squealing in pain while complaining about everyday stuff. But the way he tells his jokes is by little sentences about the topics that just make you explode with laughter every time.

I.E - "I moved houses so I went to Ikea, what a miserable place that is. How the fuck do you get out?!, I was stuck there for 5 and a half hours."

Coldplay - Lovers in Japan

Coldplay time !

Probably one of the best songs from, "Viva La Vida or Death and All his Friends". Even better when COLDPLAY perform it LIVE.

Millions of confetti butterflies are released during the chorus

In addition to this, Chris dances around the stage with a Japanese umbrella

The lights also change colour and flood the stage with blue or red washes

Now time for awesome people from COLDPLAY

Jonny Buckland - Look at the awesome guitar with the Viva finish

Guy Berryman

Will Champion and Chris Martin

The :: End of, "The ::"

OK well, the way this blog started, the way that all my posts were titled fit the theme and looked consistent. But now it's just annoying me. So this is the final post that will have the title format of, "The :: (Insert topic keyword here)".

:)

The :: Accusations

Well today, something terrible happened.

So let me set the scene for you;

Location: Supa IGA, Joondalup
Time: 4 PM Approx

Witnesses: Annie, Conor, Liam

I stand in the confectionery aisle, with Conor and Annie.

Annie and Conor are looking at the delicious chocolate treats, so as to select some to purchase, I however decide not to get anything, and am merely accompanying them for the purposes of friendship.

As I stand with them, I begin to discuss how I recently viewed a Russian version of Disney Pixar's new hit, "UP".

Mistake.

As soon as I mention that the film seems to have been, how should I put this, not official, this old man, also in the aisle starts giving me odd looks. Obviously, because I have an unofficial copy of a film, I'm involved in drugs and guns and gangs and knives and physical abuse of the elderly. Just as Conor finishes advising me to not visit the Ukrainian movie downloading website advertised during the movie, the man approaches me.

I initially think that the man must be of Russian origins and may be talking to me in order to advise me, in addition to Conor, to definitely not visit, "UnionGang.org.ru". However the man says something completely unexpected.

The following dialogue takes place;

Man: "Make sure you pay for whatever's in your pockets too"

Joe: "Oh, I don't have anything in my pockets"

(Awkward silence ensues, before it is broken by Joe opening his right pocket to reveal an MP3 player that may have been producing a somewhat suspect bulge. Annie begins to laugh hysterically)

Joe: "Just an MP3 player"

Man: "Oh, wrong person"

I then make the mistake of thinking that this terrifying ordeal is over, I soon find out that it is not.

Man: (Quite rudely) "Other pocket"?

Joe: (Opening other pocket to reveal a tiny shred of paper, yeah I steal paper all the time ...), "See, nothing"

Annie is still laughing EXTREMELY loudly, and the man becomes embarrassed and red in the face. He walks away, disgraced.

...

Obviously I'm an incredible renegade who doesn't play by the rules. I don't need to listen to the authorities, I get by on my street smarts.

I stole all this chocolate

Seriously, what the hell ...

How, in any world, state, solar system, planet or dimension I, Joseph Blay, could be accused of stealing I do not know.

Especially considering Conor was there. Probably the most suss renegade teen out them ... But the creepy Ukrainian guy doesn't pick on him, no! Instead he picks the last person who would steal.

...

Not all bad, now I got some totally mad street cred for all ma phat homies in da hood !

R3PR3ZentIn !

The :: Incredible Music

Here I go thinking, "Oh no, I won't listen to Mercury Rev' new album, I'll do it later. It won't be as good as their other stuff". I put it off for a long, long time.




Well I just listened to it ...


HOLY SHIT !

And I call myself a Mercury Rev fan ... I can't believe I missed this ! It is so amazingly brilliant, I feel like a dick for not having faith that Mercury Rev could produce more fantastic music.


What's even better about this discovery is that, along with their new album, Snowflake Midnight, the band have also released another album, Strange Attractor, free to download from their website.



http://www.mercuryrev.com/index.php


Reviews about Snowflake Midnight -

http://www.mercuryrev.com/albumpress.html





Go and listen to, "Snowflake in a Hot World" right now !

The :: Challenge

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, I challenged my mother to not eat meat for a whole year. She lasted 9 months before accidentally eating a steak without thinking and losing the challenge.
This week, I made a passing comment about this. In my stupidity I stated, "I could last longer than nine months".
To which I received a reply of;

"Oh yeah, lets see about that, I challenge you, Joseph Blay, to not eat meat for longer than nine months"

I begrudgingly accepted the challenge and now, my dear friends, am unable to eat meat products starting this Monday, the 21st of September.

BLAISEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ... tell me what to eat !